That’s right – we had another boy! I am inching one step closer to soccer mom status every day. Haha.
Oliver was born early in the morning on the 30th after a smooth labor and delivery and we brought him home Memorial Day. He’s healthy, I’m trying to get a routine down and the rest of the household is adjusting to our new addition – Jeremy is happy for newborn cuddles at night after we put Elias down for bed, Elias is learning how to be a big brother and the cats are spending all their time upstairs and away from the chaos. Haha.
It’s been four weeks and it already feels like time is speeding up – I swear my boys are noticeably bigger every time I look at them. For now, I’m trying to slow down and cherish the little things every day that I get be a part of because I am a stay at home mom – everything from meltdowns over wanting to help make hot chocolate to Elias cuddling up next to me and Oliver and telling me I’m his best friend (and then also telling me Oliver is his best friend 🙂 ).
Being a mom is the hardest and most rewarding thing I have ever done and I cannot wait to see where this next step in our adventure takes us. 🙂
First off I’d like to say that what I’m about to write is extremely hard to talk about. Infertility is such a painful and private struggle that affects so many people – most that suffer through it in complete or partial silence. Often times people are embarrassed, depressed or afraid of how others may judge them; although I was never embarrassed I definitely dealt with my fair share of depression and anxiety throughout our fertility journey. I’m hoping that by opening up about what we went through gives someone else the courage to seek out a diagnosis, treatment or just be able to talk to someone without fear of judgement.
We kept our struggle with infertility as private as possible until we could see a light at the end of the tunnel; finally becoming pregnant after almost two years of trying gave me the courage to speak up and hopefully help someone else find answers. I will try to be a thorough as possible and if there’s anything you’d like further clarification on or have a question about please feel free to let me know!
And…I’m back! It literally seems like yesterday I was typing up my first trimester Q+A; things have been so different this time around and it’s been difficult to keep up with anything other than pregnancy and motherhood. It’s hard to believe I’m well into my third trimester! In just a few short weeks, we will finally meet our new addition – to say we are all excited is a bit of an understatement. Elias talks about the baby every day and we’re hoping that we’ve prepared him the best we can and that he will love being a big brother.
So this post was planned and written a looooooong time ago but pregnancy ups and downs and the holidays have kept me well away from pretty much any mommy time. Between napping when Elias naps (which I NEVER did when he was a baby – too much to get done!), muscling my way through workouts, trying to keep up with the house and crashing on the couch by 6:30, I just can’t seem to muster up the energy to really do much else. And honestly, I’m not pressuring myself to do much more. I’m finding more and more these days that simplicity and happiness are more important to me than packing my calendar full. Maybe that’ll change once COVID is under control and we can actually live more normal lives but for now I’m quite content to be in my sweats, playing Playdoh with my son, eating take out and growing our family. 🙂
Now on to what you’re really interested in – pregnancy Q+A!
It’s a party! It’s a ‘que! It’s a barbeTWO! Super clever over here. 😉
Immediately after having Elias’ first birthday I came up with the idea of having a barbecue for his second birthday. Hence the invention “barbeTWO” or BB2 as I like to shorten it. Why that choice when there is literally NOTHING to be found ANYWHERE as far as decor, ideas, etc that use a BB2 theme. THAT is exactly why. Of all the “donut grow up” or “two sweet” or perhaps my personal favorite “baby shark…two…two…two…two” I have yet to find anyone else throwing a barbeTWO. And, I mean let’s face it – barbecue.
Throwing parties are one my absolute favorite things to do and I’m always bombarded with questions like “where did you get ______” and “how did you ______”. I have an open book policy when it comes to hosting events; I will tell anyone anything they want to know. Even my stepdad was asking me where I got the buffet serving utensils and how much I paid….and then he tried to (jokingly) steal them. Haha.
So here’s a run down of the who, what and where of Elias’ BB2. I may have inadvertently left some things out and maybe some details aren’t as specific as you’d like – just ask. I’d be more than happy to answer any questions or go into a bit more detail in the comments! 🙂
So it’s been two (mostly) unintentional months since I last posted – it’s 2020, ya’ll, literally NOTHING has gone as expected – but I’m back.
Today I am finally going to start the weight loss challenge giveaway that I promised you all weeks ago! When I started the weight loss challenge, I told you all that if I won I would host a giveaway here. Well, I didn’t win – I actually came in dead last and I was the only one who finished the challenge weighing more. As discouraging as that sounds, I’m actually not upset about it. I learned a lot about myself during the 10 weeks and I’m in a good head space. I know that the weight will come off eventually.
As for the giveaway details, I really had a hard time coming up with a giveaway that I felt was appropriate for the challenge and my results. I had originally wanted to giveaway some of my favorite workout gear but I sort of changed my mind when I realized that, for me, this challenge was really about getting healthy, not weight loss or a diet or gear.
Because I spent so much time during this challenge working on new self care routines and working on my mental health, I have decided that what this challenge needs is for the dead last “loser” to give away an Amazon gift card for the winner to spend as he or she pleases. Call it a completion trophy. Haha.
So starting today and running through Friday the 9th, you can enter the giveaway up to two times by signing up for emails from petite noir and/or letting me know in the comments how you plan on spending your $25 Amazon card should you win. (And no, it does NOT have to be “to buy workout gear” or “for skincare” or “new athletic shoes”. You want to load up on toilet paper or fancy chocolate? Own it. Those are good for your mental health too. 😉 ) The giveaway is only open to US residents and I will notify the winner via email within three days of the giveaway end. (Please make sure the email address you use is valid so I can send your prize should you win!)
In the five minutes I have been sitting here staring at my screen searching for a place to start I’ve re positioned my keyboard, mouse and wrist rest multiple times, I’ve sipped my coffee and I’ve glanced over and over at the baby monitor almost praying Elias will wake up so I don’t have to write this right now.
That’s how uncomfortable imperfection (and talking about it) makes me.
I have always been an over achiever with perfectionist tendencies. My family knows it, my teachers used to comment on it and it has brought me to some really great places and some REALLY shitty places. (Scouts’ honor, there is absolutely no other way to describe those places.)
Most people don’t really understand the negative effects of perfectionism – because most people who have perfectionism are really good at hiding them. Struggles + failure = imperfection. And no self respecting perfectionist would EVER let those secrets see the light of day.
Lucky for you, I have no self respect. 😉 Kidding. Totally kidding. But let’s chat anyway. read the post
Potty trained: having been taught to use the toilet. That is straight from the Merriam-Webster dictionary. Seems simple enough, yes?
We were newly married when a lot of our friends and family started having babies. We were then newly pregnant when a lot of those babies grew into toddlers. We were rookie parents when those toddlers started potty training. Having a newborn in diapers while watching other parents struggle with toddler toilets and floor pooping was a double edged sword – we were thankful we were not there yet (because we would have had absolutely NO idea what to do) but we were also well aware that our turn would come soon enough.
I’m willing to risk some backlash here because, let’s face it, I’m a mom and I will ALWAYS get some sort of backlash for some decision I make having to do with child rearing. (Let’s also have a reminder here that the moment you get pregnant, EVERYONE knows what to do better than you for ANYTHING having to do with pregnancy, child birth and being a parent.) Trust me, I’ve been there, I’ve heard it, I’ve dealt with it and at the end of the day I really don’t care. My child is healthy, happy, thriving and loved – that is ALL that truly matters.